Master Lock 265D Door Security Bar, Pack of 1, White

In most states, tenants have a right to 24 hours notice before the property is shown. Check your local (state AND city) tenants' rights laws and then you'll know if you're allowed to bar/block the entrances when you aren't expecting anyone. (You probably are.)

A cheap rubber stopper under each door while you're home should do the trick, or you can get really secure with something like https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_fabc_vt33FbDCMCFTH

> those safety alarms

Or something like this: https://amazon.com/gp/product/B0002YUX8I/ If you set it up correctly (and test it out), it should be much harder to force the door open.

I have a question if you've really kicked down doors.

How effective do you think those bars that lock into the floor to brace the door are?

I saw one once that looked a bit like this security bar

But there were a few differences.

1. The bar was steel.
2. There was a metal plate covering the area where the bar meet the door, maybe 1' x 1'.
3. The bar clipped into a recessed metal latch that had a hole for a pin or padlock.

I've never kicked down a door, but if you've got a quality door (solid wood) that seems like it would be fairly effective and easy to implement.

Just an idea for the DIYs who don't want to go build a new home right away.

You can get a bar which fits under your lock and prevents the door being opened. You just put it in place, no DIY skills needed. Very useful when you are home alone and at night.

It’s also a good device if you are worried someone has your key. They are available on Amazon and Lowe’s also sells them.

Master Lock 265D Door Security Bar, Pack of 1, White https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_yJ3JFbT7KYF91

I highly recommend getting a security bar for your door. I got one when I lived alone and it provided a huge amount of peace of mind for me to know that someone couldn't just kick my door down. Also came in handy when maintenance people tried to come in without proper notice.

Also just an FYI since people are recommending Ring doorbells, just be aware that Amazon (who owns Ring) has agreements with ICE to provide data and video footage from Ring doorbells. Their security and data usage agreements are pretty questionable.

Master Lock 265D Door Security Bar, Pack of 1, White https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_NTGhFbE32F3HS

These are much cheaper.

Jam one of these in there...

https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I

I am so sorry this happened to you. Until you are able to get an additional lock, I recommend using this while you are home. Master Lock 265D Door Security Bar, Pack of 1, White https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_hdkbFbBQ235VX

Use this to lock your door when you change

Your mom has serious boundary issues. Remove your toiletries from the bathroom after each use and keep them somewhere in your room. Anything you’re not comfortable with her using should be kept out of common spaces. Also, it’s not just weird that your mom won’t respect the boundary of NOT BEING THERE WHEN YOU CHANGE but it’s disrespectful and completely inappropriate. If you’re not comfortable with it, it’s not acceptable and honestly it’s disturbing.

you should get a portable door lock since there’s no key or some sort and it’s pretty easy to use. below is an example, i’m not affiliated with the company or anything but it seems like you could use it.

https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=mp_s_a_1_12?dchild=1&keywords=door+stopper&qid=1595466302&sprefix=door+&sr=8-12

Replace the strike plate on the doorframe. Quick and easy (two screws per plate). You can get much larger / beefier plates. Also, don’t use the shitty 1” wood screws that come with it. Get some nice, solid 3” screws.

This is the #1 weakness on most doors, and the thing most people forget about. You can have a badass steel door with fancy locks, but a shitty strike plate can rip straight out of the frame.

They also make security bars that go under the doorknob and angle out a bit. Most of them have rubber “feet” so they grip better on wood or tile. Here’s an example on Amazon:

https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I

I’d also recommend adding a video doorbell. It’ll give you an alert on your phone if someone approaches your door, and give you a live video / audio feed.

You can use this: https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=sr_1_6?dchild=1&keywords=door+blocker&qid=1603250378&sr=8-6

While I recognize your question is about the legal aspect of breaking your lease, there are some things you can do to help yourself feel safer while you’re sorting out the rest.

One thing you can do is to reinforce your door frame against it being kicked in. It’s really cheap and easy, and I did this to my apartment just a few months back. This news video shows why it’s helpful. Basically, just get some 3” screws, and replace the short screws that hold the strike plate (the part that looks like this) for both the door knob and the deadbolt on your door. The idea is that the longer screws anchor the frame into the actual wall, instead of only to itself. It’s much harder for people to kick in.

You can also brace your door knob from the inside, like a fancier version of sticking a chair under the knob to hold it. The security braces aren’t too expensive, about $20. Keep in mind that if you want to use this type of brace, it will people out, but it will also keep you in. If you have a fire or other emergency where you need to leave quickly, be prepared to remove this device. Practice with it so that you don’t get yourself trapped.

You could also consider motion activated alarms or lights, or a camera system, or other similar types of defense systems, but these get complex and expensive quite quickly. Still worth looking into, but it’s a rabbit hole!

I really appreciate the subreddit r/homedefense because they have great methods of beefing up your own home security, but they don’t just tell you to buy a gun. The idea is that a weapon is the last resort, and if you have good preventive security, it won’t have to come to that.

Best of luck and feel free to PM me if you’d like! My husband and I would be happy to help you out.

I’d purchase this if I were you.

It's just a basic door security bar like this one. You prop it under your door handle.

https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=door+brace+security+bar&qid=1586272406&sprefix=door+brace&sr=8-3

Jumping on safety

• Replace the screws in the strikeplates of your doors with longer, heavy duty screws. It makes it near impossible to kick it in.

• Buy door jambs and set them up against your doors when you're inside, especially at night. I use these guys on all of my in-swinging doors. They sell ones for sliding doors and out-swinging doors as well. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=cm_sw_r_other_apa_i_36xUEbD8BB49Z

• Measure the space between the top of your bottom window and the top of the top window and go to a hardware store to have them cut dowel rods you can slide in there (for windows that slide up). It makes it impossible for anyone to open that window unless it's removed.

• Invest in a motion detecting camera (I use Canary for $10/month). It automatically turns on as soon as I reach a certain mileage from my house and sends me alerts on my phone if there's any movement. If you can only afford one, put it in your bedroom facing your bedroom door because that's where theives will go for jewelry and medication.

Break ins do not just happen in crappy areas, in fact they happen more frequently in nice areas because that's where the nice stuff is. And for God's sake PLEASE stop putting those decals on your car advertising who is in your household!!!

Found this! https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=metal+bar+door+stopper&qid=1595204788&sr=8-3

What’s stopping the LAOP from buying a $20 door security bar like this one?

It’s entirely removable and causes no damage to the apartment. I’d be using it each and every time I came home. I’d also be checking my lease and laws for how much notice the landlord has to give and following every bureaucratic trail I could to raise hell.

God, I kinda miss living in shitty apartments when I had all the time in the world to be a paper-trail, bureaucracy-flexing asshat.

Reach out to the police anyway, don't assume they can't help you, give it a try. Definitely try to stay elsewhere for a while, maybe friends he doesn't know about, make sure he has no way to track you so you won't put them in danger.

You can also rack up security around the house, check amazon for some security equipment, I kkow they have alarms and cameras that you can install at yout front door, alarms for the windows, stuff like this https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=mp_s_a_1_5?dchild=1&keywords=security+window+bar&qid=1589459380&refinements=p_72%3A2661618011&rnid=2661617011&sr=8-5

thereare also safety bars dor window that don't require drilling holes and a protective film you can stick on glass so it doesn't shatter when broken

I used to work in the ghetto and a lot of people had these for extra security. https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=door+security+bar&qid=1606585000&sprefix=door+sec&sr=8-3

In a rental where you might not be able to change the screws, you may want to look into these portable door security bars: https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I

I use one on my garage back entry door.

> I can’t help but blame myself for letting him go that far, for even befriending him in the first place. I feel weak for letting him control my life even after I had the courage to cut him off..

This is not your fault. You attempted to set boundaries and he kept violating it.

To be honest, it will be very difficult for you to deal with this if you keep staying in an environment that brings a lot of fear and trauma up. If you just can not leave at the moment, do your best to make yourself feel safe and confident:

• Talk to friends/family, ask them to check in on you if possible.
• Set up cameras if possible.
• Set up door sensors, or buy these type of locks: https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=sr_1_8?dchild=1&keywords=door+locks&qid=1592020420&sr=8-8
• Carry self defense tools.
• Look into self defense classes (I recommend Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, Muay Thai, Boxing).
• Meditation/Journaling your feelings and emotions.

I’d get a door security bar to set up when your home and you don’t want anyone coming in. That’s regardless of whether you come to an agreement with your apartment complex management.

Master Lock 265D Door Security Bar, Pack of 1, White https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_fab_elPAFbTE8SR53

You could cet a door lock/security bar like this one. Obviously your mom would still have a key, but you could tell her that it's just for your personal safety and has nothing to do with her.

If possible I would recommend a friend or family member come check out your locks to make sure they’re in good shape or even replacing the locks if allowed. I don’t know if you overthink yourself into oblivion like I do, but I suggest getting a Security Bar

Also, wall decor such as paintings & frames will really make your apartment feel like home & not temporary. It’ll feel like a comfortable haven & make you feel a lot better when you come home.

Get yourself one of these - https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I

I had one when I worked nights and lived in an apartment. If the person trying to get in is reasonable, they’ll realize the door isn’t opening and continue to knock much louder (my experience). If they’re unreasonable, you could end up with door damage. And if it is a true emergency and they force their way in, you’ll probably be liable for any damages. I was ok taking this risk.

extremely cheap but popular. 6,000 reviews

Master Lock 265D Door Security Bar, White https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_EIZTEbGQJF774

Yes! They tend to slide on hardwood or tile so I use a door mat for added traction. You can also find them at Home Depot or Lowe’s.

https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I

It's been a while but do dorm rooms still have that cheap carpet that's basically hardwood, if so I recommend this if you're in the US, it's what my friend used. Edit: she had a lot of high end make up she worked her butt off for and a roommate in the adjoining room who thought sharing was caring without asking.

I know you didnt ask for items or products but these are a decent solution for apartments since you (usually) cant modify anything existing.

https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I

It seems like you need to get one of these door braces to secure your privacy while YOU'RE in the bathroom:

https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=sr_1_1_sspa?crid=1DOFFO963N3PL&keywords=door+brace+security+bar&qid=1583361251&sprefix=door+br%2Caps%2C158&sr=8-1-spons&psc=1&spLa=ZW5jcnlwdGVkUXVhbGlmaWVyPUFVUFRZWE0yUTBJUjEmZW5jcnlwdGVkSWQ9QTAwOTYyMDIxQkM5MURUSVVVTTcyJmVuY3J5cHRlZEFkSWQ9QTA5MzE0OTYyODU4M05HU1RMSTlOJndpZGdldE5hbWU9c3BfYXRmJmFjdGlvbj1jbGlja1JlZGlyZWN0JmRvTm90TG9nQ2xpY2s9dHJ1ZQ==

Maybe this? Could be removed in case of fire.

https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=sr_1_2?crid=1M5J902K3I2JO&dchild=1&keywords=door+brace+security+bar&qid=1594922318&sprefix=Door+brace%2Caps%2C188&sr=8-2

That’s terrifying! Window gates, a security camera that has a light or alarm with motion detectors and I would also get one of those door jammer bars.

So sorry you have to deal with that. How uncomfortable.

You can also buy one of these security bars:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glc_fabc_.D.YFbA32TMWS

I would, you have new baby coming. So if she’s not a good sleeper and shares the room, it’ll affect your sleep too. If you want to feel better about the exterior door, maybe buy one of those security bars, here’s one on Amazon

security bar .

You can use this to keep the door shut without a lock. Master Lock 265D Door Security Bar, Pack of 1, White https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0002YUX8I/

Its a little more extreme, but consider getting the following :

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_BWmJFbRT55J2V

Works like a charm, and it's also good for keeping out burglars

Blackout curtains, A door jammer, and a weighted blanket.

edit: reasons >curtains: speaks for itself, no sunlight in your face when you wake up

>jammer: peace of mind, not everyone feels its necessary though

>weighted blanket: helps you sleep so much better

Hey man you might want to check out a door barricade like this. You prop it under the doorknob/against the floor and it makes it basically impossible to open the door. Master Lock 265D Door Security Bar, White https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_ilWQEb9T3VVXT

I’m so sorry you’re going through this and that you don’t feel safe in your own home. I’m sorry your parents don’t seem to be supporting you in all of this. Don’t be afraid to do what’s best for you. hugs

Edit: changed the link bc it posted wonky. You can get one at Lowe’s or Home Depot though if you don’t want to wait for Amazon. I hear they’re planning a strike tomorrow anyway.

You can easily get something like this:

https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=sxin_3_ac_d_rm?ac_md=0-0-ZG9vciBibG9ja2Vy-ac_d_rm&cv_ct_cx=door+blocker&keywords=door+blocker&pd_rd_i=B0002YUX8I&pd_rd_r=7451cf68-e9f1-43c9-8f53-5f25f38cef5c&pd_rd_w=jj9AD&pd_rd_wg=OrqPa&pf_rd_p=de19e82a-2d83-4ae8-9f5c-212586b8b9a0&pf_rd_r=MRDWSY7DWS3BFC5K9DFA&psc=1&qid=1582205294

Then report the incident to the school housing department.

General advice:

1) Replace your swiss army knife with pepper spray. Not only is a knife fight a bad idea, displaying it wouldn't even be intimidating. A bright flashlight is also a great defensive tool that could help buy you enough time to run away. At minimum 100 lumens, but I'd shoot for 1000. Added benefit: it makes perfect sense for you to have that in your hands while walking your dog.

2) Put longer screws in the strike plates on your doors. Your landlord won't notice, nor would he or she care. You could also substitute/supplement with a door brace security bar.

3) Windows are weak points and there's little you can do aside from making them a bigger pain in the ass than your neighbors' windows. Blocking them, lighting them, and locking them securely are all good ideas. Consider shatter alarms to draw attention if a window breaks. That might be enough to spook someone into running, but if they're breaking your windows to get in then there's little you can do to stop them.

4) I'd swap out the hockey stick for something easier to wield and that would do more damage. Think shorter and denser, and ideally sharp. A bat is better than a hockey stick, but go with a T-ball bat rather than a full sized wooden bat. A machete is good because it's intimidating -- no one is going to want to risk you landing a swing on them with a big, sharp blade. I'd hesitate to use pepper spray indoors, especially in a NYC-sized apartment. I've been in the same room as pepper spray before, and it's incapacitating for everyone.

5) Consider putting one of those security bars in your bedroom -- give yourself an option to retreat if someone does break in. Secure the door, call 911, and grab your blunt/sharp object.

It's good to plan ahead, and you should harden your home the best you can. But I think you're overall pretty safe. Don't lose any sleep about it, but if you can make some adjustments to make it a pain to break in then even better.

TL;dr:

pepper spray > knife

machete > baseball bat> hockey stick

a bright flashlight could buy you time to escape/attack

Get a lock. If you don't want one to permanently install then get something you can place on the door at night like a door bar or a portable door lock.

This is the one I've got: https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I

You can also go with a basic noise alarm: https://www.amazon.com/Upgraded-Security-Portable-Entrance-Apartment/dp/B07WNCVJD8

NTA. Sounds like sexual harassment: it's an unreasonable time, it's unwanted, there's no good reason for it, you're an adult, and it's fucking creepy. You could report her to the cops. I'd suggest getting a deadbolt and set of keys for your bedroom door. At least a door jam bar, but if you've got carpet those don't work. like this: https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I

door jam alarm like someone else said would be great, don't worry about waking the baby. tell everyone it's there before you put it there. if your mother wants to be foul and wakes the baby, that's her problem and selfishness, not yours. she can explain to your niece and sister why her perversion was more important than the baby sleeping.

Several times.

First of all, your anxiety is not an impediment. It is an asset. It is alerting you to the danger and the way you make it through this is by listening to it. There is something about this persons' behaivour that is setting you off.

Used to have a room mate who owned a dozen firearms, body armor, et-cetera. Cooked his head off on lead when reloading (idiot cleaned brass with a open top tumbler next to his bed and breathed in the dust, he was not bright) and we asked him to move his stuff out of the garage so we could use it, He got almost violent and decided to move out onto someone's couch and ended up stealing a lot of shit in the process. Guy had blood pressure so high it'd knock him out at times. Wasn't able to hold down a job. Haven't seen him in 4 years.

Basically, when 2 people are living together, anything they leave with is theirs unless you have a lock and key and camera footage.

Move all of your valuables into your room and replace the door lock with a lock and key. Install a dead bolt if you feel the need. I also reccomend you get a cheap motion activated camera to watch your things when you are not there. You can get wifi versions of these as well for cheap. This prevents your property from being stolen. Boxing up the property ahead of time one day and storing in your room is a solid strategy or taking it to a local storage place is another option if you can afford it.

You can also install a door jamb bar, they also make ones that go into the floor to stop the door from ever opening. This provides you with a degree of physical security. If you have the means, owning an inexpensive firearm is a tremendous security. Wather or Glock are good brands, if you need advice, PM me. I am an encyclopedia on firearms and can help you develop a self-defense strategy.

Another angle; what you may be able to do is setup a surveillance camera in the living space and if your roommate is acting dangerously (or is on drugs), call the police on them while they are in the act and provide the footage. You do not need their consent to record them in a shared living space and especially in a space you own. If you feel your life is being threatened, do not hesitate defend yourself. You are not in the business of making excuses for them. If it's just a lot of yelling and high strung conversations\anger, everyone's having a hard time right now, it's shitty.

Normally, I'd reccomend looking up eviction laws in your state and make sure you know what you are doing. Trump has signed an EO to stop evictions until I think next January so you may not be able to evict them.

Another option is to move yourself into a cheaper apartment or to move in with someone who is paying bills and let the landlord deal with evicting the subleased tenant if you think this is going to be a long-term issue or will develop into a dangerous situation =-). Make sure to sit down with the landlord and, verbally, have a discussion to let them know what is going on and why. Both of you have a problem, they are unlikely to be able to help you but they can't hold it against you if you are honest. Lots of places are going to shit and hell you might even be able to swing a deal for an apartment at the same place.

If you decide to stay with them and help them out, make sure you having a financial discussion and documenting the underpayments or non-payments if you are subleasing. I believe they are tax deductible.

Good luck.

This is the best advice OP, do not pay May rent because you’re never getting your security deposit back (provided it’s the correct amount for your rent). If they try to come in- call 911 and block your door. This product is very amazing and I have used it. It can also be purchased here

NTA but op you should buy a door blocker that you put under the handle so she can't open the door since you arent allowed to get locks.

https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=sr_1_5?dchild=1&keywords=door+blocker&qid=1607089617&sr=8-5

I am very worried for you. T is incredibly disturbing. He is like this with just you? A psychopath can't easily hide himself behind a facade ALL THE TIME. Are there any teachers, friends, classmates, girlfriends who said similar things about T? If your parents and brothers won't believe just you, you need other people who agree with what you're saying.

What disturbs me most is T trying to break into your room and bathroom. I'm worried he wants to do something very bad to you. I want you to get a door jammer, like one of these: https://www.amazon.com/Master-Lock-Security-Adjustable-White/dp/B0002YUX8I. It's only $20. Stick it on your door at night, and T can't get into your room without literally smashing down the door (and he can't do that without raising questions). I doubt he'd complain to your parents, because what good reason does he have trying to break into your room at night?

Get a pepper gel. I'm not sure what state you're in, but a pepper spray or gel is legal in most. Keep it constantly on your person and another one in your bedside table or under your bed. If the worst happens, you can knock even a grown man down with a good shot of pepper spray at the eyes.

I suspect T doesn't terrorize your other brothers because they're older and stronger than him. Not your fault, obviously. Learn a few self-defense techniques: kicking/twisting balls, punch to the Adam's Apple, biting, scratching with nails.

Try to convince your parents to let you move to another room on the first or second floor. Since they won't believe you about T, say something like, "I don't want to share a bathroom with a boy, I'm embarrassed to have my feminine products out, etc." Swap rooms with one of your older twin brothers, since they'll be away at college anyways. Say it's too cold or too hot on the third floor, or complain, "T stays up at night and watches videos on his phone really loudly so I can't sleep. The second floor would be quieter."

Long-term, T needs to be out of your life. If you can, I want you to record the times T says these creepy things to you so that you can show your parents. Hopefully they stage an intervention and gets T some help.

If they still don't believe you, you need to move out as soon as you can. Research scholarships for college (in case your family refuses to support you), find good friends who can take you in. Are there any sympathetic relatives, like an aunt or cousin?

Is T planning on going to college, and if so, would he be out of the house?

There’s a trick with a fork that you might be able to improvise into working for you. Just look up fork door lock on YouTube. There’s also a product you can buy that works better. Portable door lock. All it needs is a door handle.

Links: FINENIC Portable Door Lock for Home and Travel Safety, Travel Lock, Airbub Lock, Childproof Security Lock, Suitable for Home, Hotel, School, Apartment etc. Living Security Device, Personal Protection https://www.amazon.com/dp/B084TH58P5/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_LYo6EbGADPQNY

Master Lock 265D Door Security Bar, Pack of 1, White https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0002YUX8I/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_uZo6Eb0082DSC

This one has an alarm: https://www.amazon.com/Stopper-Security-Portable-Entrance-Apartment/dp/B086H3CCHD